Marriage Tip #3 – Compromise

Every couple comes to a point when both want different things. When we reach that point, we have three options:

  1. Argue your point and why it’s better
  2. Give in to what your partner wants
  3. Both of you compromise

To come to a compromise, both parties need to be willing to work together. It takes an open mind to consider the possibilities and self-sacrifice if you want to please your partner. Below are some basic steps to reaching a compromise:

  1. Start with the right tone. Don’t come off attacking or irritated. 
  2. Find a common ground. Don’t focus on what you and your partner disagree on but what areas you are similar. 
  3. Brainstorm some new ideas for you and your partner to decide on. 
  4. Be willing to change your mind. Sometimes changing your mind becomes the best decision and you love what you thought you never would. 

Some examples from my own life now to show areas where either my husband or myself has made a compromise. Let me first explain that me and my husband are complete opposites but we complement each other very well. 

  1. We have different tastes in music. I couldn’t stand his so he gave mine a chance. Now he loves the same music so there are no issues. 
  2. My husband loves computer games and I’m usually too busy to play them or care for them. He waits until the kids are asleep to play so he’s not leaving me when I need his help or want to get out. And I make sure to get the kids to bed early enough so he has time to play. 
  3. I love taking pictures of the things I love but always end up missing from them. My husband hates being in pictures. So he will ask others to take the picture for us so I am in them and he gets passed his annoyance of photos so I am happy with the photos we got. 
  4. My husband alway leaves his clothes in the bathroom and I used to continually ask him to bring it back to the room and put in a basket. Now we have a small clothes hamper in the bathroom and that’s pretty much always his clothes so no pre sorting. 

I know there are probably more but I can’t think of many cuz we have always found a solution. 


So, my advice to you is, don’t be so hardheaded that you won’t give the other persons perspective a chance but don’t be too passive that you become someone you’re not. 

Let me know in the comments of this helped you or seems to be true or not for you. 😊

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Marriage Tip #2 – Keep Dating

Some people fall into a rut once they get married and the one thing I’ve learned to remember is, when you get married that doesn’t mean you stop dating. Before you get the wrong idea, just take a moment to think about it. 

By continuing to date your spouse, that means you don’t stop going on date nights, or doing the small cute things for one another like writing notes or doing small surprises. I’ve made a short list of a few keys to dating your spouse and what that means exactly. 

  1. Don’t forget the small things – All that means is to remember it’s the small daily things that show each and every day that you choose them as your love and appreciate them. That even means holding hands, just some small physical contact creates a strong bond. 
  2. Don’t forget to laugh – Getting to share moments of laughter really strengthen the bond in a relationship. It’s crucial to be able to laugh with someone and enjoy each other’s company. 
  3. Don’t forget to celebrate your love – Even if you aren’t into Valentine’s Day, it means so much to give a gift to your partner just to show you care and go out of your way for the other. 
  4. Try new things together – Whether that means new food or learning how to dance, it is always fun to feel the sense of adventure and brings you closer together as you learn something. 

All I’m saying is don’t lose your spontaneous, playful, meaningful and child-at-heart relationship with your spouse.

Marriage Tip #1 – Communication

Every couple will have disagreements or have something that is bothering them on their mind. Secret to a happy marriage and keeping your sanity- communication. 

This past weekend we spent hanging out with other couples with kids and we all talked about our problems. Mine was simple – finances. We are trying to save to buy a home in the next few years and working out a budget can be problematic. Both the other women didn’t have that problem but they had a more troublesome one, they were not agreeing in their marriages and have started counseling. Biggest issue, they didn’t know how to talk to their partner or didn’t want to talk to them. 

From day one with my husband we agreed to tell each other everything so that we had nothing to hide. Ever since we have kept to that and tell each other the good, the bad and all in between. It keeps a strong bond of trust and faithfulness but also shows respect for one another. We have learned that being able to talk about anything and everything really makes our marriage feel like a wonderful friendship because we listen and understand each other.

Learning to work together when it comes to disagreements has been the most valuable tool. Aaron, my husband, is a little hot tempered while I stay calm and collected. To make disagreements work, Aaron will step away to calm down and then come back to talk. We NEVER bad mouth the other person or insult them; this helps us avoid saying things you don’t mean and later regret. Most of the time we meet in the middle but sometimes one of us may have a valid argument that we eventually agree upon.

Listening is an important part of communication. My husband has had bad days and it’s my job to be there for him to vent. And I’m sure everyone has had a day that is emotionally draining and they just need to talk about how they are feeling. Aaron is wonderful at this; dealing with two pregnancies and my wild emotions, he has always be considerate of how I’m feeling. Not only that, but things that made me uncofartable at the beginning of our relationship, he listened and understood where I was coming from and has since changed to not do something that bothers me. So don’t just talk, but listen and be ready to give advice or a solution.

Lastly, no matter what mood you are in – happy, sad, frustrated or angry – we always say “I love you.” I’ve had moments when I’m upset with him but that doesn’t mean I don’t love him, so by saying those three little words, he can be sure I still care and makes me realize being upset isn’t worth it. If looking forward five years, this disagreement doesn’t make a difference – it’s not worth it.

I guess what I’m saying is talk about everything with your partner. Make them your best friend and be their best friend in return. Don’t hold grudges cuz they only create bigger problems and resentment. Life is short so choose to make happy memories over bad one, you can’t go back and change anything so work with what you got and move forward with that. I hope I’ve given y’all some insight to a key feature of a happy marriage.

Any questions or comments are welcomed, just comment below!

Thanks for reading and until next time πŸ˜‰

Love, Cloe

#marriedlife #communication #wisdomwednesday