Every couple will have disagreements or have something that is bothering them on their mind. Secret to a happy marriage and keeping your sanity- communication.
This past weekend we spent hanging out with other couples with kids and we all talked about our problems. Mine was simple – finances. We are trying to save to buy a home in the next few years and working out a budget can be problematic. Both the other women didn’t have that problem but they had a more troublesome one, they were not agreeing in their marriages and have started counseling. Biggest issue, they didn’t know how to talk to their partner or didn’t want to talk to them.
From day one with my husband we agreed to tell each other everything so that we had nothing to hide. Ever since we have kept to that and tell each other the good, the bad and all in between. It keeps a strong bond of trust and faithfulness but also shows respect for one another. We have learned that being able to talk about anything and everything really makes our marriage feel like a wonderful friendship because we listen and understand each other.
Learning to work together when it comes to disagreements has been the most valuable tool. Aaron, my husband, is a little hot tempered while I stay calm and collected. To make disagreements work, Aaron will step away to calm down and then come back to talk. We NEVER bad mouth the other person or insult them; this helps us avoid saying things you don’t mean and later regret. Most of the time we meet in the middle but sometimes one of us may have a valid argument that we eventually agree upon.
Listening is an important part of communication. My husband has had bad days and it’s my job to be there for him to vent. And I’m sure everyone has had a day that is emotionally draining and they just need to talk about how they are feeling. Aaron is wonderful at this; dealing with two pregnancies and my wild emotions, he has always be considerate of how I’m feeling. Not only that, but things that made me uncofartable at the beginning of our relationship, he listened and understood where I was coming from and has since changed to not do something that bothers me. So don’t just talk, but listen and be ready to give advice or a solution.
Lastly, no matter what mood you are in – happy, sad, frustrated or angry – we always say “I love you.” I’ve had moments when I’m upset with him but that doesn’t mean I don’t love him, so by saying those three little words, he can be sure I still care and makes me realize being upset isn’t worth it. If looking forward five years, this disagreement doesn’t make a difference – it’s not worth it.
I guess what I’m saying is talk about everything with your partner. Make them your best friend and be their best friend in return. Don’t hold grudges cuz they only create bigger problems and resentment. Life is short so choose to make happy memories over bad one, you can’t go back and change anything so work with what you got and move forward with that. I hope I’ve given y’all some insight to a key feature of a happy marriage.
Any questions or comments are welcomed, just comment below!
Thanks for reading and until next time 😉
#marriedlife #communication #wisdomwednesday